Authors versus editors in the ultimate challenge. The authors of the world hereby challenge editors to an international game of lacrosse. Keep it clean and let the best profession win.
Authors vs Editors: Game of the Century
You editors have been insulting us authors ever since near the beginning of human activity. When the first author scratched the first words on a cave wall, an editor stood by and said: “Oh my god! You butchered it!”
You can’t help it. Some suggest it’s in your genes. Now, it’s payback time. Don’t chicken out or be late. It’s lacrosse time.
Where will we play?
I propose Jamaica. I need to visit, anyway. I’ll be a great tour guide. I know my way around and, as a bonus, there’s a nice goat pasture overlooking the Caribbean blue where we can all meet and play.
Among the advantages:
- Panoramic views.
- Great music.
- Marvelous beaches.
- Thriving local culture.
- Mouth-watering food.
- Lots of entertaining characters.
As soon as you editors figure out how to play!
- One of us authors will write a book on lacrosse.
- One of you editors can go through it and tell us how much it sucks.
- One of the authors will rewrite it, and perhaps even follow some of your snazzy suggestions.
- One of you editors will tell us that we did a little better, but that it still needs work.
- One of the authors will say: “Enough already. Let’s play!”
- Not certain we’ll ever master the rules, but both sides will agree we gave it a good shot. Besides, we authors are creative. Therefore, we’re perfectly capable, as you editors know, of making up the rules as we go.
Authors, remember to be humble in victory. Editors, remember to be gracious in defeat.
On a serious note…
On a serious note, thanks to every quality editor who helps authors make our books readable. You’re an invaluable part of the team. I hope you know how much most of us appreciate you.
Authors versus Editor by Jerry Beller